Why did the candy go to therapy on Halloween night?

Because it was feeling a little wrapped up in its problems.

What instrument does a skeleton play?

A trom-bone.

Why did Frankenstein's monster struggle so much with his new IKEA furniture?

He just couldn't get all the 'parts' to come together correctly!

Why did the Creature from the Black Lagoon go to the post office?

Because it wanted to send a shell-abrate greeting card to its friend.