Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?

He wanted to improve his bite

Why did the werewolf only go to the barber once a month?

Because he only needed a trim during the full moon.

Why did the Creature from the Black Lagoon get rejected for a mortgage?

The bank said he didn't have enough liquid assets, and they were worried about his water damage history!

Why did the mummy get so frustrated with his new smartphone?

He kept trying to 'un-wrap' the screen protector, but ended up unraveling himself!