What do you call a belt made of watches?

A waist of time.

Why did the bicycle fall over?

Because it was two-tired!

So I was trying to fix a squeaky door hinge in the house today, and my son came over to watch. He asked me why the door was making such a loud noise every time I opened it.

I told him it was because the door was feeling unhinged!

I took my mushroom to the party because

he was a fun-gi