I took my car into the shop the other day because it was making a weird knocking sound under the hood. The mechanic spent a long time listening carefully and checking all the hoses and belts.

He said he needed to do some intensive car-diology.

So I was out in the garden trying to plant some new flowers today. I accidentally dug up a whole bunch of old potatoes that had been left in the ground from last year.

I guess you could say it was a real 'spud' awakening!

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high, she looked surprised.

I'm trying to start a band, but it's been a real struggle to find a drumstick that's a cut above the rest.