I went to the doctor and said, 'Doc, I've got a problem, I've been feeling a little horse lately'

I told my wife she was going to be a great musician, but she didn't believe me.

I guess you could say she was a little off-beat.

I tried to make a belt out of watches, but it was a...

...complete waist of time.

So I was at the library the other day, and I saw a book about eggs that really caught my eye. The cover was pretty ordinary, but the title was what really made me crack a smile.

It was an egg-cellent read.