My therapist identified my attachment style as 'anxious-preoccupied.'

Which perfectly explains why I keep checking if my DoorDash order is still 5 minutes away.

I love how our company says 'we're a family here'

except when it's performance review time and suddenly I'm a foster kid up for adoption

My financial advisor asked me about my long-term investments.

I told him, 'My houseplants. They're the only thing in my life consistently showing growth.'

My boss scheduled a 'wellness check-in' meeting,

and I nearly had a stress attack just putting it on my calendar.