I was driving home today and saw a car pulled over on the side of the road with a flat tire. I felt bad for the driver, it looked like they were really stressed out trying to change it.

I guess they were having a *tire-ing* day.

Why did the bicycle fall over?

Because it was two-tired.

What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear.

My daughter was doing her homework and came to me complaining. She said her pencil wasn't working and she couldn't write anything.

I told her, 'Well, if it's not working, it sounds like it's pointless!'