I got my dad a new smart thermostat for Father's Day, thinking it would finally put an end to his temperature tinkering.

Now he just complains that the future isn't warm enough.

I asked my dad what his ideal Father's Day relaxation involved.

He said, 'A few hours in the garage, finally organizing my screws by size and thread.'

My dad said he didn't need a thing for Father's Day this year.

But then he added, 'Unless you happen to know where my *other* tape measure is. The good one.'

My dad's garage is so organized,

he can find a screw from 1992, but still can't find his reading glasses that he left on the workbench 5 minutes ago.