Why is putting up a Christmas tree so complicated for cat owners?

Because it instantly becomes a giant scratching post and climbing gym.

What do you call a mischievous candy cane?

A hook-lum!

Why did Santa hire a lawyer for the elves?

Because he heard them singing 'All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth' and wanted to make sure they got proper dental care!

What do you call Santa when he takes a break?

Santa Pause!