I took my kids to the zoo and we saw an exhibit on elephants

and I said, 'I've got a trunk-load of jokes about these guys!'

I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner; it was just gathering dust.

So I was at the coffee shop this morning, and the barista accidentally spilled some coffee all over the counter. He looked really flustered and apologized profusely.

I told him not to worry, because sometimes you just gotta *espresso* yourself.

So I was at the park with my kids, and we saw a person flying a kite that was shaped like a shark. The kids were thrilled to see it soaring through the air, and we started talking about the different types of kites you can buy. I asked the person how they got their kite to fly so high, and they said

it was a jaws-dropping experience