My daughter was doing her homework and came to me complaining. She said her pencil wasn't working and she couldn't write anything.

I told her, 'Well, if it's not working, it sounds like it's pointless!'

Why was the broom late?

It overswept!

I took my cat to the vet because it was having some issues with its whiskers

The vet said it was just a purr-manent condition

Why did the baker break up with his girlfriend?

Because he kneaded space.