Why did the cranberry sauce feel embarrassed?

Because it saw the turkey dressing!

In my family, the biggest Thanksgiving debate isn't politics or who gets the last drumstick.

It's who gets to make Grandma's 'secret recipe' stuffing this year.

My family's Thanksgiving dinner is the one place where

the only thing we pass around the table more often than the mashed potatoes is criticism.

Why was the Thanksgiving meal always so well-respected?

Because it had so much gravy-tas.