Why did the cranberry sauce refuse to argue?

It didn't want to get into a jam.

As I carve this magnificent bird, I just want to remind everyone at the table...

...there will be absolutely no *fowl* play allowed today!

My family's post-Thanksgiving dinner tradition isn't board games or Black Friday planning.

It's a synchronized, involuntary nap on every available soft surface.

I've got a great idea for a Thanksgiving joke, but it's still in the

thawing-out process