I've got so many side hustles,

my main job is starting to feel like a very expensive hobby.

I've been trying to adult by following boomer advice

But it turns out 'investing in myself' just means I'm $50,000 in debt with a degree and a Peloton

I've been reading all these self-help books to improve my mental health

now my apartment is just a pile of unread books and unfulfilled potential

I asked my boomer dad for housing advice

He said 'just save up and put 20% down', which is like telling me to 'just buy a unicorn and ride it to work'