I've been dating a girl who's into tantric sex, which is all about prolonging the experience.

Now I know why her Netflix subscription is still active after 6 months of us watching the same episode of 'Stranger Things'.

I've been dating a clockmaker, and she's always trying to wind me up

My girlfriend told me she wanted to grow some herbs in the garden.

I told her I was more into deep rooting and extensive ground cover.

I've been dating a girl who's a talented cryptologist, and she's always trying to get me to crack her code.

But honestly, I think she's just looking for someone to decrypt her daddy issues.