I've been thinking, what did the grape say when it got invited to Thanksgiving dinner?

Nothing, it just let it wine down and join the family

At my family's Thanksgiving, the only thing more stuffed than the turkey...

...are the guests an hour later, trying to stay awake on the couch.

I'm the king of the kitchen on Thanksgiving, and I've got a special title

I'm the gobbler of governance, the lord of the leftovers, the sultan of the stuffing – but my family just calls me Dad

At my family's Thanksgiving dinner, we have a special tradition

We all bring our appetites and our opinions, but only one of them is welcome to stay for dessert