I've been learning how to make the perfect soufflé from a French chef

She says the key is to beat it until it rises, then take it out before it falls

I've been dating a professional upholsterer, and she's been teaching me how to reupholster our love life.

Now we're stitching together a strong relationship, one layer at a time, and it's getting deeper with every seam.

My wife told me she needed me to really get down and dirty tonight, handle something long and stiff, and then help her get it off.

She just wanted me to help her change the vacuum cleaner bag.

I've been dating a professional gemologist, and she's been teaching me about the importance of clarity and brilliance in our relationship.

But honestly, I'm just looking for someone with a little more cut to them.