Alright everyone, it's time to carve this magnificent bird!

Who's ready for some *poultry in motion*?

Why does this magnificent turkey have such an incredible pull on everyone at the table?

Because it has amazing *gravy-ty*!

Why did the stuffing always win debates?

Because it had all the right fillings!

My grandma keeps asking if I'm seeing anyone at Thanksgiving.

I tell her I'm seeing a lot of judgment, a little gravy, and a path straight to the pie.