A man and a woman walked into a bar, and the bartender looked up and said, 'What is this, some kind of joke?' The woman smiled and said they were on their first date, and the man had promised to show her a great time.

So he pulled out a condom and said, 'Let's get started on the main course.'

I've been trying to improve my relationships by taking a wine and paint class

Now I'm better at handling brushstrokes, but still struggling to find a good blend

My dad took me fishing for the first time last weekend.

He told me the secret was to get a good, firm grip on the rod, bait the hook just right, cast it out deep, and then reel it in slow and steady until you feel a good tug.

My girlfriend told me she wanted a man who was good with his hands, like a carpenter.

She said I spend too much time measuring and not enough time nailing.