My girlfriend told me she wanted me to be more spontaneous in bed.

So I just started shouting 'SURPRISE!' every time I came.

My new fitness trainer is really intense. She says the key to a great session is to get really low, push hard against resistance, and focus on those long, deep thrusts for maximum benefit.

Apparently, I'm going to be an amazing competitive rower.

My girlfriend told me she wanted to spice things up in the bedroom, said she wanted me to try 'anything I've always fantasized about.'

So I spent the night meticulously organizing my sock drawer, occasionally asking her if she liked the new filing system.

My rock climbing instructor told me I needed to improve my grip.

I told him, 'Funny, my girlfriend always tells me I've got a fantastic grip.'