My boss told me I need to stop coming up short on my deadlines.

I told him, 'At least I'm not the one coming early.'

I've been dating a girl who's into erotic photography, and she asked me to pose for her.

Now I'm a model, but only in the classical sense – I'm only good for a few positions.

My therapist told me I need to be more present in the moment.

I told her sometimes I just can't help myself from coming early.

I've been dating a girl who's a cartographer, and she's always trying to map out our relationship.

I guess you could say she's looking for a little more territory to explore.