I was at the beach with my family, and we spent the day building sandcastles and collecting seashells. As we were walking along the shore, we came across a big sandcastle that had been washed away by the waves, leaving just a small mound of sand behind. My kids were disappointed, but I just chuckled and said

I guess that castle just couldn't weather the storm!

Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer?

He couldn't see himself doing it.

What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear!

I'm addicted to placebos — I could quit, but it wouldn't make a difference.