What's the real 'Polar Express' for most parents on Christmas morning?

The express trip from their bed to the coffee maker.

Why did Frosty the Snowman have kids

Because he wanted a family that was chill

Why did Santa's elves start a union at the North Pole?

Because they wanted to clause for better working conditions

Why did Santa's elves start a petition at the North Pole?

Because they wanted to clause for better working conditions