Before they met their partner, [Groom/Bride] was known for being incredibly decisive and independent.

Now, I hear them spend an hour discussing whether the 'greige' or 'taupe' throw pillow better complements the sofa.

I was talking to the groom about his expectations for married life

He said he's looking forward to having a partner in crime, and I think he's going to get that – every time they look at their joint bank statement

My wife and I have been married for ten years and we still share a closet.

By 'share,' I mean her clothes live *in* the closet, and mine live *on* that one chair in the bedroom.

I've noticed that since getting married, our conversations have become very efficient

Now, instead of saying 'I love you', we just say 'WiFi password?' and the other person knows exactly what we mean