I love how my family's Thanksgiving dinner is supposed to be a time for catching up, but it always ends up being a competition

to see who can fall asleep at the table the fastest

I'm the king of the kitchen on Thanksgiving, and I've got a special title

I'm the gobbler of governance, the lord of the leftovers, the sultan of the stuffing – but my family just calls me Dad

Why did the turkey get bad grades in math?

It kept gobbling up all the numbers!

I've been thinking, why did the turkey join the gym?

To get some egg-cellent abs for Thanksgiving dinner!