I turned my morning commute into a cinematic experience, complete with a soundtrack and an imaginary film crew

Now I'm just waiting for the Oscar nomination for 'Best Performance While Sitting in Traffic'

Some guys on dating apps say they want a woman who's 'natural,' 'doesn't wear too much makeup,' 'low maintenance.'

But then you show up without a full glam squad and they look at you like you're an uncooked potato.

I've realized I essentially have two completely separate wardrobes now.

There's the 'present me' wardrobe, which is 90% comfortable leggings and oversized sweaters. And then there's the 'aspirational me' wardrobe, full of tailored blouses and impractical heels, patiently waiting for a life I'm apparently too busy or tired to live.

I went to the grocery store to pick up some milk, but as I was walking down the aisle, I felt the urge to add some flair to my shopping experience.

So, I started voicing my inner monologue out loud, 'I'll just grab this gallon of 2%... the choice of a woman who's given up on love, but still holds on to hope... and also needs cereal for the week.'