Before they met their partner, [Groom/Bride] was known for being incredibly decisive and independent.

Now, I hear them spend an hour discussing whether the 'greige' or 'taupe' throw pillow better complements the sofa.

Before we got married, my wife would spend an hour getting ready for our dates.

Now, if she brushes her hair before we leave the house, I know it's a special occasion.

We started planning our dream wedding with a modest budget and a simple guest list.

Then our parents got involved, and now we're just trying to find a second mortgage to cover the open bar.

I've learned that marriage is all about finding creative ways to ask for permission

like saying 'honey, can I watch the game?' when what I really mean is 'can I ignore you for three hours?'