Dating, I've always thought, is a lot like an audition. You're bringing your A-game, showing off your best qualities, and hoping for a callback.

Marriage, on the other hand, is when you get the part, but quickly discover you're now also the director, costume designer, and chief caterer for the rest of the run.

When we were dating, my husband would surprise me with flowers and thoughtful gifts.

Now, I consider it a romantic gesture if he just remembers to put his dirty clothes *in* the hamper.

When we were dating, my husband used to send me romantic texts like, 'Missing you already, can't wait to see you!'

Now, his most romantic text is usually just, 'Did you remember to take the trash out?'

I remember when the groom used to spend his Saturdays glued to the TV, watching sports marathons and playing video games all day long.

Now, he spends his Saturdays helping the bride choose curtain fabric and learning the difference between ecru and ivory. That's not just love; that's dedication, folks.