I decided to start a career in baking, but my cakes weren't rising to the occasion

I've been trying to organize my spice rack...

It's taking a lot of my thyme.

My son was reading a book about volcanoes, and he came across a really interesting fact about how they erupt. He asked me if I knew how volcanoes tell secrets.

I told him they usually 'lava' to tell the truth.

Why was the math book sad?

Because it had too many problems.