So I was at the store today with my kids, and we saw a huge display of eggs. The kids were cracking each other up, making jokes about eggs, and we started talking about omelets and scrambled eggs. I asked the store manager if they had any special deals on eggs, and he said

they were egg-cellent values

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

She looked surprised.

I tried to write a pun about a broken pencil, but it was pointless.

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field!