I love how my family's Thanksgiving dinner is supposed to be a judgment-free zone

but somehow my aunt always manages to fit in a critique of my life choices between the mashed potatoes and the green beans

Why did the stuffing go to therapy?

Because it was feeling crumby

Why did the cranberry sauce go to the party dressed as a turkey?

Because it was a berry good disguise and a fowl way to get an invite

I told the turkey to come to the table with an attitude adjustment

but it was a little fowl-tempered