Why did the bicycle fall over?

Because it was two-tired!

I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough.

I decided to start a career in baking, but my cakes weren't rising to the occasion

My daughter was doing her homework and came to me complaining. She said her pencil wasn't working and she couldn't write anything.

I told her, 'Well, if it's not working, it sounds like it's pointless!'