My computer was acting up the other day, and I was getting pretty frustrated with how slow it was running. I called my friend who's a computer expert to see if he could help me figure out what was wrong with it.

He told me it was probably just having a bad byte.

Why did the bicycle fall over?

Because it was two-tired.

What do you call a grape that complains all the time?

A whine.

I tried to write a pun about a pencil, but it was pointless.