Why did the head elf always carry a ruler around the toy workshop?

To make sure everything was made to *elf-act* specifications.

Why did Santa's elves start a North Pole union?

Because they wanted to clause for better benefits.

Why did Santa's elves go to the North Pole's HR department?

They wanted to workshop their toy-making workflow and Claus for concern!

Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing?

Because they always drop their needles!