My coffee order was wrong this morning.

And I didn't just ask for it to be remade. I gave the barista a slow, dramatic stare, as if this minor inconvenience was the inciting incident for my entire origin story.

My male colleague got a promotion and immediately started delegating all the 'team morale' tasks to me.

Apparently, my natural ability to remember birthdays and organize potlucks is now considered a 'leadership quality.'

I walked into a new coffee shop this morning, and the vibe was just right.

So before I even ordered, I meticulously scouted the perfect table for my 'protagonist deep in thought' moment, complete with a dramatic sip and a pensive stare out the window.

I swear some guys on dating apps say they want a 'low-maintenance' woman.

But then expect her to show up looking like she just finished a photoshoot. Honey, my 'low-maintenance' look involves dry shampoo and a prayer.