My morning commute isn't just me stuck in traffic.

It's the opening scene of my gritty urban drama, and every car around me is just an extra in my carefully curated B-roll.

I tried to achieve that effortless, 'I just threw this on' look this morning.

It took me 45 minutes, three outfit changes, and a minor emotional crisis over whether nude heels were *too* expected.

I saw a guy's social media post about 'manifesting his dreams' and 'being a go-getter'

but his LinkedIn profile says he's been a 'freelance social media consultant' for 5 years, which is just code for 'I still live with my parents'

He told me he was looking for a woman with a 'great sense of humor' on his dating profile.

Turns out that just meant someone who laughs at all his *okay* jokes.