I've realized I essentially have two completely separate wardrobes now.

There's the 'present me' wardrobe, which is 90% comfortable leggings and oversized sweaters. And then there's the 'aspirational me' wardrobe, full of tailored blouses and impractical heels, patiently waiting for a life I'm apparently too busy or tired to live.

I've started to think that my planner is just a book where I write down all the things I'm pretending to have control over

I love how some guys on their dating profiles claim they're 'passionate about travel' and 'love adventure.'

Turns out 'adventure' means driving an hour to a different state's Buffalo Wild Wings.

He said I was 'too picky' because I wanted a guy who could hold a conversation and, you know, ideally have a job.

Meanwhile, his dating profile said 'seeking a woman who's naturally gorgeous, a gourmet chef, and loves watching all 8 seasons of my favorite anime.' Pretty sure we have different definitions of 'picky,' fellas.