I asked my parents for housing advice, and they said to just 'save up' and 'be patient',

which is like telling someone to 'just breathe' while they're drowning in student loans.

I'm thinking about starting a family.

But then I remember climate change, and I just buy another houseplant.

I asked my boomer dad for housing advice

He said 'just save up and put 20% down', which is like telling me to 'just buy a unicorn and ride it to work'

I've been working really hard to build my personal brand.

Turns out my personal brand is just 'tired.'