My bank told me I qualify for a mortgage.

I laughed so hard my avocado toast fell.

My therapist asked me what my five-year plan was.

I told her, 'Survive and maybe afford therapy for another five years?'

My manager told us to 'find our resilience' during this impossible quarter.

I found mine in updating my LinkedIn profile.

Our CEO said we're a family here, so

I'm waiting for my vacation days to be paid in hugs and apologies for making me work on Thanksgiving.