I'm trying to buy a house, but the market is insane

I've got a better chance of winning the lottery than getting a mortgage with a payment that's less than my student loans

My parents always said they wanted me to have a better life than them.

Now it looks like the only thing I'm inheriting is their economic anxiety.

I just got a raise, but it's basically just an inflation adjustment

So now I can afford last year's lifestyle, congratulations to me

My therapist asked me what my biggest fantasy was.

I told her: a 40-hour work week.