Thanksgiving dinner at my house is a real test of endurance

because we don't just eat until we're full, we eat until we're separated by paramedics

Why was the stuffing always the life of the party?

Because it was so well-dressed!

Why was the Thanksgiving meal always so well-respected?

Because it had so much gravy-tas.

Thanksgiving dinner at my house is like a science experiment

because we're never quite sure what's going to explode first, the turkey or my aunt's opinions