My parents asked if I'm saving for a down payment.

I told them I'm saving for the societal collapse – feels more realistic.

My financial advisor asked me about my long-term investments.

I told him, 'My houseplants. They're the only thing in my life consistently showing growth.'

I've been doing the work in therapy to develop healthier coping mechanisms

Now I can procrastinate with a clear conscience and call it 'self-care'.

I'm at the point where I'm considering a side hustle

to pay for the side hustle I already have to pay for my main job