Alright, everyone, the star of the show has arrived! Before I start carving this magnificent bird...

...I just hope I don't make a *fowl* move!

Our family's Thanksgiving dinner seating chart isn't about politeness or proximity to the food.

It's a strategic battlefield plan to minimize exposure to Uncle Steve's political theories and Aunt Carol's 'When are you getting married?' interrogation.

Why did the cranberry sauce go to the counselor?

It was feeling a little jellied under the pressure

At our Thanksgiving dinner, we have a tradition where everyone shares what they're grateful for.

But honestly, it's just a competition to see who can come up with the most creative way of saying they're thankful for wine.