We set a wedding budget.

Then we realized that budget was just for the napkins.

I've been thinking, what's the difference between a marriage and a game of Jenga?

In Jenga, you start with a solid foundation and take things apart, but in marriage, you start with two crazy people and try to build something that doesn't fall apart

My wife and I have been married long enough that we've really learned to share.

Especially the bathroom counter space, which she's learned to share by allowing me one tiny corner for my toothbrush.

When my wife and I were dating, I'd bring her breakfast in bed every weekend.

Now, if I remember to start the coffee machine before she wakes up, I'm basically a superhero.