We thought we'd found the perfect wedding venue

until we realized the 'romantic garden' was actually just the groundskeeper's enthusiastic weed collection

Before they got married, [Bride's Name] and [Groom's Name] probably envisioned idyllic mornings, waking up to birds chirping and breakfast in bed.

Now they'll get to experience the joys of waking up to a smoke detector chirping, because someone forgot the toast.

I was talking to the groom the other day, and I asked him how he knew the bride was the one for him.

He said it wasn't the candlelit dinners or the romantic getaways, it was when she didn't leave him after seeing his browser history.

When my wife and I were dating, I’d spend an hour getting ready for our date.

Now that we’re married, I consider it a win if I remember to put on pants before she gets home.