Dating, I've always thought, is a lot like an audition. You're bringing your A-game, showing off your best qualities, and hoping for a callback.

Marriage, on the other hand, is when you get the part, but quickly discover you're now also the director, costume designer, and chief caterer for the rest of the run.

We designed our wedding seating chart with scientific precision.

Mainly to keep Aunt Carol and Uncle Bob in separate time zones.

We told our families we wanted a simple, stress-free wedding.

They responded by submitting a combined 15-page document outlining their 'gentle suggestions' and 'absolute requirements.'

When my wife and I were dating, I’d spend an hour getting ready for our date.

Now that we’re married, I consider it a win if I remember to put on pants before she gets home.