Alright everyone, time to get to the 'meat' of the matter.

I hope this carving demonstration is truly carve-tivating!

Our family's Thanksgiving dinner is so unpredictable,

we've started setting the table with a fire extinguisher and a therapist's phone number.

I've got a great idea for a Thanksgiving joke, but it's still in the

thawing-out process

Alright, folks, before I start carving this magnificent bird, I just want to say...

This turkey is really *fowl-play*ing with my emotions!