My wife and I have been married long enough that we've truly mastered shared living spaces.

She gets the bedroom closet, and I get the laundry basket in the hall.

We decided to have an open bar at our wedding to keep our families happy

Now we're just hoping to have enough money left for the honeymoon, or even a marriage

Before [Groom's Name] met [Bride's Name], his idea of a perfect Saturday involved epic gaming sessions or spontaneous road trips.

Now, I hear his biggest weekend triumph is successfully assembling IKEA furniture, and occasionally, getting to choose the movie on Netflix... after a lengthy negotiation.

I remember [Groom's Name] once told me he was looking for someone who would complete him.

Now that he's found [Bride's Name], I think he's realized 'completing him' mostly involves knowing where he left his keys and reminding him to take out the recycling.