I'm at the point where I'm treating every minor setback like it's a dramatic plot twist

I just spilled coffee on my shirt and I'm pretty sure I heard a lone violin playing in the background

He told me he’s 'so over' all the superficiality and fake stuff on social media.

His last Instagram post was a picture of him holding a single coffee mug, staring contemplatively out a window, with the caption '#deepthoughts #morningvibes #unfiltered.'

My therapist told me I needed to 'be present' and 'live in the moment.'

So now I just aggressively stare at my to-do list, convinced I'm practicing mindfulness.

I was parallel parking yesterday, which, for me, is usually a low-stakes exercise in mild panic.

But with my main character energy, I reversed so slowly and deliberately, eyes narrowed, as if I were a master spy expertly maneuvering a getaway vehicle to a dramatic orchestral score only I could hear.