Why did the cranberry sauce go to the party?

Because it was a berry good dancer

Why did the turkey get kicked off the football team?

Because it kept *fowl*ing up the plays!

Alright, folks, before I start carving this magnificent bird, I just want to say...

This turkey is really *fowl-play*ing with my emotions!

Our family Thanksgiving dinner is like a recipe for disaster

Because you take a cup of crazy relatives, add a pinch of old grudges, and stir in a whole lot of tryptophan