Alright, folks, before I start carving this magnificent bird, I just want to say...

This turkey is really *fowl-play*ing with my emotions!

In my family, the most anticipated event at Thanksgiving isn't the food or the football game

it's watching my aunt and uncle try to use Snapchat to send a group photo

I'm the king of the kitchen on Thanksgiving, and I've got a special title

I'm the gobbler of governance, the lord of the leftovers, the sultan of the stuffing – but my family just calls me Dad

Our family's Thanksgiving dinner is like a perfectly balanced recipe

one part love, two parts argument, and a whole lot of gravy to smooth things over